The Sandwich Incident

Captain's Log:
We're in the process of moving out of Trevor's apartment and onto the boat. I've already taken lots of clothes, dishes, food, and towels (omg, so many towels, but we probably still won't have enough) to the boat and have managed to find places for them. Go me! My years of Tetris are really paying off. Who says video games rot your brain? I managed to get all of our books (all of them!) into the two square ottomans (you know the ones from Wal-Mart and Target that are so awesome). Tetris at work, my friends.
So we're in the middle of moving out. We knew it would be an awkward time of transition, but so far it's gone pretty well. Until this morning. Last night we packed up most of the kitchen, some going to Trevor's parents' basement, some going to the boat, some going to my parents' basement.
Well, I decided this morning that instead of my usual bowl of cereal, I'd use our last tomato and have a sandwich. We also had a little bit of mozzarella left. I even broke out the jar of pesto: a caprese sandwich! I was psyched; this was going to be an awesome sandwich! Sadly, the mozzarella had gone all spotty. No caprese sandwich! Naturally, I started cursing that horrible refrigerator. Seriously, it's awful. I don't know how much food we've lost to it's inconsistent cooling (and dripping water, let's not forget that). I've blamed a lot of it on Aldi's cheap meats, but now I think that was unfair. It's the refrigerator. I won't miss it at all. Sometimes it's better to do without something completely (refrigeration) than put up with subpar quality. It's like Comcast internet. When the reliability of something is spotty, you'd rather just go without and have no expectations than always be disappointed in what you think you can count on. Bam! Slamming Comcast and this craptastic refrigerator all at once! Take that, disappointing things in my life!
Captain's rant: it was bound to happen eventually. This is a blog after all.
Back to the sandwich, which was already a disappointment due to lack of mozzarella. So I put away the pesto, because it would just make me think of what I couldn't have. Straight tomato and mayo sandwich: still always a good choice. I reach for the cutting board to slice up my tomato: no cutting board. It's packed away in a box in the trunk of my car. Ah well, I'll use a plastic plate, no problem. I go to the silverware drawer to get a knife. Empty! We packed up Trevor's silverware to go home and the knives are divided between boat stuff (in the car) and going home (some mystery box somewhere). Fortunately, I had my knives. Butter knives. But they're serrated, and a serrated knife can cut surprisingly well. (I've actually managed to cut my finger on a serrated plastic knife before; true talent I have.) So I hack this poor tomato into thick slices with my butter knife. Totally works! If it had been a yummy, ripe tomato, I think it would have turned into mush. But this was a crappy, tasteless, very firm, store-bought tomato, so it sliced beautifully. And I finally made my sandwich. A rather tasteless (Aldi tomatoes = not good at all) sandwich, but still a victory. I overcame all this adversity in my way and emerged (relatively) victorious.
Long blog about a sandwich, right?
Stay tuned for the next episode in The Adventures of Cap'n Rumslinger!